Two children into middle age, I pee when I sneeze, but I’m as well youthful, much too wholesome to warrant the jab just but. And I’m neither bitter nor jealous about that. As extra people today close to me are inoculated, I delight in imagining my close friends and family — nurses and social workers, getting older hippies and favorite restaurant employees — embarking on whatever shenanigans they’ve been dreaming of these previous quite a few, terribly sterile months.
This 12 months has been at when horrible and horribly monotonous. It is a contradiction I haven’t totally grappled with. But it is there. And if the only positive issue that comes out of this awful time is a raunchy, joyous period of unbridled enjoyment and (consensual) encounter-licking, I’m below for that. Indicator me up to be your submit-pandemic wingwoman. I’ll be easy to place. I’ll be the one toting a Luggable Loo.